A drunk southern man walks into a bar
Hopin' no one smells the bodies roastin' in his car
Says "one more drink man, 'n' I gotta run
Think I got a tequila worm in my whiskey jar"

He said "Heeey, that worm told me these things ain't real
Told me not to believe my eyes, but I can still feel it."
Man says the tequila's goin to his head
Hearin' voices all around him singin'
And he sings

chorus:
"Ahhhhhyeah, one more bottle to steal my soul
Yaahhhha, that little worm is all I know
Baby, I ran so far
Still a tequila worm in my whiskey jar"

Young hispanic girl sits in the car
Wonderin' why she's waitn' for that asshole drinkin in the bar
Takes a gun in her hands
Ain't gonna be no more whiskey jar

chorus

"I once had a woman, she was o so fine
We drove across the world in the blink of an eye
But she fell on my bullets, sixteen times
And there was nothin' left to drink but non-alcoholic wine..."

And she screams into his face "I ain't dead yet!"
And he's just grinnin', starin' at her breasts
She puts her only bullet right in his head
And everyone around's too drunk to give a damn...

chorus